Muftis and Ramayana

It seems that Muftis -- Mufti Mohammed Sayeed and his daughter Mehboba -- have taken out a leaf from Ramayana and decided to follow what "Kaikeyi" did after King Dasaratha had not taken hints on making Bharata King of Ayodhya. Kaikeyi had a "Kop-Bhavan" (sulking palace) but Poor Mehbooba and her father had no place to go other than the official accommodation other than that provided by UPA Government. According to a crow having his nest at Papaji's residence, poor father-daughter duo were trying hard to overcome the humiliation met by Mufti Saheb during his meeting with Papaji, Bong Bandhu Pranab dada, Mr Tip Top. Poor dada had to do the dirty work of of making Mufti Saheb realise that he could no longer play politics over innocent blood of poor people of Jammu and Kashmir. Sans asking Mufti to pay for his lunch served at Papaji's residence, everything else was conveyed. After all poor dada and other members of UPA curry team had been bursting after the chair of Chief Ministership was taken away from Mufti Saheb's bums. The Muftis tried hard to meet Sonia next day to seek a face saving but could not manage as Congress President's Advisers advised her rightly for the first time. So the next course of action --- Got themselves locked up in the house (Kop Bhavan) and started sulking till neighbours started complaining of pungent smell. This was followed by usual anti-India rhetoric and trying to project themselves as true Kashmiris. But I believe that Kashmiris have understood their game plan and are not falling the trap. So what next Mufti Saheb and Mohtarma Mehbooba ji -- What about taking a leaf out of Jim Carry-starer, Chuck Russell's movie "The Mask" or may be the Hijjab may turn into a Burkha (veil) now....

Mr Tip Top

My bones have already started shivering...na na...its not out of fear but because of the Mr Tip Top will meet some people including me and my colleague this evening. What am I going to ask is not that is worrying me but how many Saridon and Combiflam I need to carry is my biggest worry. If I survive the ordeal, I will come back and post a blog but if I am no more, all of my readers know what happened. This has again pushed me into memory lane when I had met him for the first time, I nearly survived a heart attack as to whether I was meeting a Union Minister or a constable of local police. This time, I have to undergo the torture again because one of colleague seems to be intrigued that can anyone be this inefficient. So its better to show him and let him have a first hand experience rather than believe what people say. Also because I want him to narrate a story to his grandchildren one day that "Humare Pyare Mantri ji". Ever wondered that Mr Tip Top can put to shame even cine star Jitendra because of his dressing sense.

Old is Gold

And guess who had papaji today at his residence last night. Kashmiri dish again served and this time the guest of honour were Abdullah's -- the father-son duo -- Farooq and Omar. After all the Centre had to open its eyes and believe that Old is Gold and New are Few. With Sayeed's (Hey! talking about Mufti Mohammed Sayeed and his daughter Mehbooba) again trying play politics over the Kashmir issue and present land row on Amarnath, poor Pranab had to virtually ask him to shut up...It was time to look for dependable...One may feel that National Conference has again tried to steal the limelight but one needs to carryout a self-introspection whether this party had anything else to do other than thinking not only of people of Kashmir but also of Jammu. A move which comes at a time when UPA's own Congress party in Jammu is shitting in their pants whereas its estranged ally PDP is trying hard to find some face saver to cross Jawahar Tunnel. What the unholy alliance in the state did from April to July did, is being undone none other than National Conference. Today when Leela Karan Sharma, who like a parrot had been narrating anti-Omar rhetoric, signed the agreement with the state government, he will have all the reasons to feel ashamed. Now when the dust is settling down, one needs to find why did this fire erupt at the first place. While my study of last 50 days, I found Omar's trust vote speech at Lok Sabha, which not only made national but also international headlines, was also trumpeted by Samiti people as a reason. So an advise to all those, please go back and read what he spoke on the floor of lower house of Parliament. Oh God! This post seems to be written by someone who is Omar's fan and I do not wish to be remotely associated with him. After all I hate politics but wonder whether he is politician. At this point my memory goes back 10 years when this 28-year-old Abdullah sibling was sitting in his easy chair as I climbed the stairs of his house located at Gupkar road. After all I was also three years old in journalism and he, hmmm...well two days old in politics after he had been elected to Lok Sabha from Srinagar. And this lad was talking about computers and other modern electronic gadgets, I wondered whether he will be able to translate his actions into words. Encounters, near encounters, have been taking place with the Young Abdullah, whose eyes have a dream of making the state of Jammu and Kashmir actually modern, where investors could come and set up their business, where latest technology would have been the order of the day, where....uff! the wish list of this Abdullah dynasty torch-bearer was long. To me he sounded less like a politician and more as a human. When his nose turned red in 2002 elections, I found him growing more mature. A terrible loss for the party that too at a time when he had been made the President of National Conference. "We lost the election but not the enthusiasm to fight back and come to power," he said and avoided from poaching MLAs from other parties. He also did not lock up himself after the defeat as is the general trend among politicians. (A secret: Mufti Saheb and his daughter have locked themselves up in Shahjahan Road after they were snubbed by the central leaders). As somebody has said (never mind, if no one has said, I am saying) A person who looses sportingly, can enjoy the victory. So may be Kashmir may see a new era through modern eye. Amen

Ministry of Home(LY) Affairs

And when one of my colleagues came rushing to me with today's cartoon's in one of the national newspaper, all I did was to murmur a few curses to myself as to how I could have missed an award winning cartoon like this. Ninan definitely deserves to be complimented for using a mere brush and little bit of his imagination to portray the feelings of 100 crore (minus his family members and some of his friends). A quick reminder of his famous utterances after the infamous terror strike at Malegaon "Jo Mare woh apne bhai thay, jinhune mara who bhi humare bhai thay (The killed as well as the killers are our brothers). last time heard was that even his own party men ask him to "SHUT UP" but in a diplomatic tone. But one must appreciate his grit and determination to remain glued to the chair despite so much of criticism. One of his able cabinet colleague, hailing from Eastern India, generally pronounces "SIT" as "SHIT". Guess what would happen in cabinet meetings when this able minister would ask our 'able' Mr TIP TOP minister. "S(H)IT HERE" and no wonder he has been continuously doing for over four years on the Chair...SHITTING

Kashmir -- Dish

Whats Cooking today!!! Poor Papaji, who is not getting time to pack his bag for the United States, has to use his time in placating Kashmiri leaders to find a resolution to Amarnath land row...Please tell them that the next Yatra will only be held next year when the government in Centre as well as the state will have changed. So it was again, Kashmir being served on a platter at the country's finest address seven-Race Course road. So went Mufti Saheb, perceived to be having an eccentric attitude, entered the house, a wish that had come true after long struggle and explanations about his party PDP's plea to various pseudo
intellectuals.
Hey! guess what..Mufti Saheb has to brave the company of Mr Tip Top along with Bangla Roshgulla and the icing is Mamu...What transpired inside was known to these people and the God but Mufti Saheb walked with his collar up...and why not as Central leaders had again remained clueless about the issue -- what is Kashmir, why in Kashmir and who in Kashmir --
As they were breaking their empty heads over the issue, they are now trying to ascertain WHAT JAMMU, WHERE IN JAMMU AND WHO IN JAMMU....Why are people in Jammu protesting... as one bureaucrat rightly pointed out "TAKE SAMITI PEOPLE AND SEPARATIST LEADERS TO THE PIECE OF LAND AND ASK THEM TO NEGOTIATE ON GROUND ZERO AND THAT TOO IN DECEMBER OR JANUARY".What I fail to understand is that who is responsible for the present situation in Kashmir.
Are those fighting on the streets of Jammu Indians or someone else. Waving National Flag in front of Police may be a stunt picked up from some bollywood movie, but one only wonders whether the protesters actually know the meaning of the Tri-colour. Our Ministry of Home(ly) Affairs is meanwhile trying to give more and more security to new found friend -- Samajwadi party leaders...Wonder who's bothered about Kashmir...may be me because I have lost hope in everything. The situation leaves me in a thinking mode as to who is governing this country -- UPA, USA, ISI or SIMI

Kashmir on a platter

This is straight from the Ministry of Home(ly) Affairs. The pot is boiling with a fresh aroma of tea filling the air as the security personnel with their automatic guns guarding country's most insensitive, uneducated (as per the portfolio) but smart and up to mark with a crease quite similar to butcher's knife used in slaughter houses of Gazipur...Trust me nothing is left to guess. So today Mr Tip top had a brain storming session and guess what was platter -- K A S H M I R -- and the present situation. The storming session left everyone hair standing but not of MrTIP TOP...excess of Parachute Coconut oil keep it virtually glued together. Finally Mr Tip Top had a date with Papaji in the evening and the full course of Kashmir was served with two Chefs -- serving and a retired -- overlooking (Grrrr! for scoring browny points). Interesting is that our Homely affairs feels at home and has the cheek to say that Jammu is more volatile the Kashmir. Wonder when our intellectuals would understand that bringing in Kashmir on the mainstream has seen tones of blood flowing through river Jehlum. Wonder when politicians will understand that everything is not politics...wonder when religion will not prove to be a wedge between people....Hey! folks, I think i am going bit philosophical because I do not know what papaji and Mr Tip Top have cooked up

Kashmir today

So were are we heading when it comes to the question of Jammu and Kashmir.. The and between the two regions seems to be living to its meaning. Today we have seen Jammu and Kashmir actually two regions within an entity and who is responsible for this. Oops! The question of responsibility makes itself eligible for "Sawal Dus Crore Ka" as everyone seems to be chickening out -- politicians, followed by bureaucrats, police.....common man. I over a period in the the profession of journalism have an opportunity to rub my shoulders with some of the bureaucrats -- senior, junior till I came to a conclusion that the road to Kashmir is totally choked.